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CHAPTER VIII
When I began to listen, it was a surprise to find that the subject ofconversation was no longer the favourite one of horse-flesh, whichhad held undisputed sway the whole evening. Uncle Anselmo was just nowexpatiating on the merits of gin, a beverage for which he confessed to aspecial liking.
"Gin is, without doubt," said he, "the flower of all strong drinks. Ihave always maintained that it is incomparable. And for this reason Ialways keep a little of it in the house in a stone bottle; for, when Ihave taken my _mate_ in the morning, and, after it, one or two orthree or four sips of gin, I saddle my horse and go out with a tranquilstomach, feeling at peace with the whole world.
"Well, sirs, it happened that on the morning in question, I noticed thatthere was very little gin left in the bottle; for, though I could notsee how much it contained, owing to its being of stone and not of glass,I judged from the manner in which I had to tip it upwards when pouringit out. In order to remember that I had to bring home some with me thatday I tied a knot in my handkerchief; then, mounting my horse, I rodeout towards the side on which the sun sets, little expecting thatanything unusual was going to happen to me that day. But thus it oftenis; for no man, however learned he may be and able to read the almanac,can tell what a day will bring forth."
Anselmo was so outrageously prosy, I felt strongly inclined to go to bedto dream of beautiful Margarita; but politeness forbade, and I was alsosomewhat curious to hear what extraordinary thing had happened to him onthat very eventful day.
"It fortunately happened," continued Anselmo, "that I had that morningsaddled the best of my cream-noses; for on that horse I could saywithout fear of contradiction, I am on horseback and not on foot. Icalled him Chingolo, a name which Manuel, also called the Fox, gave him,because he was a young horse of promise, able to fly with his rider.Manuel had nine horses--cream-noses every one--and how from beingManuel's they came to be mine I will tell you. He, poor man, had justlost all his money at cards--perhaps the money he lost was not much, buthow he came to have any was a mystery to many. To me, however, it wasno mystery, and when my cattle were slaughtered and had their hidesstripped off by night, perhaps I could have gone to Justice--feelinglike a blind man for something in the wrong place--and led her in thedirection of the offender's house; but when one has it in his powerto speak, knowing at the same time that his words will fall like athunderbolt out of a blue sky upon a neighbour's dwelling, consuming itto ashes and killing all within it, why, sirs, in such a case the goodChristian prefers to hold his peace. For what has one man more thananother that he should put himself in the place of Providence? We areall of flesh. True, some of us are only dog's flesh, fit for nothing;but to all of us the lash is painful, and where it rains blood willsprout. This, I say; but, remember, I say not that Manuel the Fox robbedme--for I would sully no man's reputation, even a robber's, or haveanyone suffer on my account.
"Well, sirs, to go back to what I was saying, Manuel lost everything;then his wife fell ill with fever; and what was there left for him butto turn his horses into money? In this way it came about that I boughtthe cream-noses and paid him fifty dollars for them. True, the horseswere young and sound; nevertheless, it was a great price, and I paid itnot without first weighing the matter well in my own mind. For in thingsof this nature if a person makes not his reckoning beforehand, where,let me ask, sirs, will he find himself at the year's end? The devilwill take him with all the cattle he inherited from his fathers, or gottogether by his own proper abilities and industry.
"For you see the thing is this. I have a poor head for figures; allother kinds of knowledge come easy to me, but how to calculate readilyhas never yet found an entrance into my head. At the same time, wheneverI find it impossible to make out my accounts, or settle what to do, Ihave only to take the matter to bed with me and lie awake thinkingit over. For when I do that, I rise next morning feeling free andrefreshed, like a man that has just eaten a water-melon; for what Ihave to do and how it is to be done is all as plain to my sight as this_mate_-cup I hold in my hand.
"In this difficulty I therefore resolved to take the subject of thehorses to bed with me, and to say, 'Here I have you and you shall notescape from me.' But about supper-time Manuel came in to molest me, andsat in the kitchen with a sad face, like a prisoner under sentence ofdeath.
"'If Providence is angry against the entire human race,' said he, 'andis anxious to make an example, I know not for what reason so harmlessand obscure a person as I am should have been selected.'
"'What would you have, Manuel?' I replied. 'Wise men tell us thatProvidence sends us misfortunes for our good.'
"'True, I agree with you,' he said. 'It is not for me to doubt it, forwhat can be said of that soldier who finds fault with the measures ofhis commander? But you know, Anselmo, the man I am, and it is bitterthat these troubles should fall on one who has never offended except inbeing always poor.'
"The vulture,' said I, 'ever preys on the weak and ailing.'
"'First I lose everything,' he continued, 'then this woman must fall illof a calenture; and now I am forced to believe that even my credit isgone, since I cannot borrow the money I require. Those who knew me besthave suddenly become strangers.'
"'When a man is down,' said I, 'the very dogs will scratch up the dustagainst him.'
"'True,' said Manuel; 'and since these calamities fell on me, what hasbecome of the friendships that were so many? For nothing has a worsesmell, or stinks more, than poverty, so that all men when they behold itcover up their faces or fly from such a pestilence.'
"'You speak the truth, Manuel,' I returned; 'but say not all men, forwho knows--there being so many souls in the world--whether you may notbe doing injustice to someone.'
"'I say it not of you,' he replied, 'On the contrary, if any person hashad compassion on me it is you; and this I say, not in your presenceonly, but publicly proclaim it to all men.'
"Words only were these. 'And now,' he continued 'my cards oblige me topart with my horses for money; therefore I come this evening to learnyour decision.'
"'Manuel,' said I, 'I am a man of few words, as you know, andstraightforward, therefore you need not have used compliments, andbefore saying this to have said so many things; for in this you do nottreat me as a friend.'
"'You say well,' he replied; 'but I love not to dismount before checkingmy horse and taking my toes from the stirrups.'
"'That is only as it should be,' said I; 'nevertheless, when you come toa friend's house, you need not alight at such a distance from the gate.'
"'For what you say, I thank you,' he answered. 'My faults are morenumerous than the spots on the wild cat, but not amongst them isprecipitancy.'
"'That is what I like,' said I; 'for I do not love to go about like adrunk man embracing strangers. But our acquaintance is not of yesterday,for we have looked into and know each other, even to the bowels and tothe marrow in the bones. Why, then, should we meet as strangers, sincewe have never had a difference, or any occasion to speak ill of eachother?'
"'And how should we speak ill,' replied Manuel, 'since it has neverentered into either of us, even in a dream, to do the other an injury?Some there are, who, loving me badly, would blow up your head like abladder with lies if they could, laying I know not what things to mycharge, when--heaven knows--they themselves are perhaps the authors ofall they so readily blame me for.'
"'If you speak,' said I, 'of the cattle I have lost, trouble notyourself about such trifles; for if those who speak evil of you, onlybecause they themselves are evil, were listening, they might say, Thisman begins to defend himself when no one has so much as thought ofdrawing against him.'
"'True, there is nothing they will not say of me,' said Manuel;'therefore I am dumb, for nothing is to be gained by speaking. They havealready judged me, and no man wishes to be made a liar.'
"'As for me,' I said, 'I never doubted you, knowing you to be a man,honest, sober, and diligent. If in anything you had given offence Ishould have told you of it, so great i
s my frankness towards all men.'
"'All that you tell me I firmly believe,' said he, 'for I know that youare not one that wears a mask like others. Therefore, relying on yourgreat openness in all things, I come to you about these horses; for Ilove not dealing with those who shake you out a whole bushel of chafffor every grain of corn.'
"'But, Manuel,' said I, 'you know that I am not made of gold, and thatthe mines of Peru were not left to me for an inheritance. You ask a highprice for your horses.'
"'I do not deny it,' he replied. 'But you are not one to stop your earsagainst reason and poverty when they speak. My horses are my only wealthand happiness, and I have no glory but them.'
"'Frankly, then,' I answered, 'to-morrow I will tell you yes or no.'
"'Let it be as you say; but, friend, if you will close with me tonight Iwill abate something from the price.'
"'If you wish to abate anything,' said I, 'let it be to-morrow, for Ihave accounts to make up to-night and a thousand things to think of.'
"After that Manuel got on to his horse and rode away. It was black andrainy, but he had never needed moon or lantern to find what he sought bynight, whether his own house, or a fat cow--also his own, perhaps.
"Then I went to bed. The first question I asked myself, when I had blownout the candle, was, Are there fat wethers enough in my flock to pay forthe cream-noses? Then I asked, How many fat wethers will it take at theprice Don Sebastian--a miserly cheat be it said in passing--offers me ahead for them to make up the amount I require?
"That was the question; but, you see, friends, I could not answer it. Atlength, about midnight, I resolved to light the candle and get an ear ofmaize; for by putting the grains into small heaps, each heap the priceof a wether, then counting the whole, I could get to know what I wanted.
"The idea was good. I was feeling under my pillow for the matches tostrike a light when I suddenly remembered that all the grain had beengiven to the poultry. No matter, said I to myself, I have been sparedthe trouble of getting out of bed for nothing. Why, it was onlyyesterday, said I, still thinking about the maize, that Pascuala, thecook, said to me when she put my dinner before me, 'Master, when are yougoing to buy some grain for the fowls? How can you expect the soup to begood when there is not even an egg to put in it? Then there is theblack cock with the twisted toe--one of the second brood the spotted henraised last summer, though the foxes carried off no less than three hensfrom the very bushes where she was sitting--he has been going round withdrooping wings all day, so that I verily believe he is going to havethe pip. And if any epidemic comes amongst the fowls as there was inneighbour Gumesinda's the year before last, you may be sure it will onlybe for want of corn. And the strangest thing is, and it is quite true,though you may doubt it, for neighbour Gumesinda told me only yesterdaywhen she came to ask me for some parsley, because, as you know verywell, her own was all rooted up when the pigs broke into her garden lastOctober; well, sir, she says the epidemic which swept off twenty-sevenof her best fowls in one week began by a black cock with a broken toe,just like ours, beginning to droop its wings as if it had the pip.'
"'May all the demons take this woman!' I cried, throwing down the spoonI had been using, 'with her chatter about eggs and pip and neighbourGumesinda, and I know not what besides! Do you think I have nothing todo but to gallop about the country looking for maize, when it is not tobe had for its weight in gold at this season, and all because a sicklyspotted hen is likely to have the pip?'
"'I have said no such thing,' retorted Pascuala, raising her voiceas women do. 'Either you are not paying proper attention to what I amtelling you, or you pretend not to understand me. For I never said thespotted hen was likely to have the pip; and if she is the fattest fowlin all this neighbourhood you may thank me, after the Virgin, for it,as neighbour Gumesinda often says, for I never fail to give her choppedmeat three times a day; and that is why she is never out of the kitchen,so that even the cats are afraid to come into the house, for she flieslike a fury into their faces. But you are always laying hold of my wordsby the heels; and if I said anything at all about pip, it was not thespotted hen, but the black cock with the twisted toe, I said was likelyto have it.'
"'To the devil with your cock and your hen!' I shouted, rising in hastefrom my chair, for my patience was all gone and the woman was driving mecrazy with her story of a twisted toe and what neighbour Gumesinda said.'And may all the curses fall on that same woman, who is always full as agazette of her neighbours' affairs! I know well what the parsley is shecomes to gather in my garden. It is not enough that she goes aboutthe country giving importance to the couplets I sang to Montenegro'sdaughter, when I danced with her at Cousin Teodoro's dance after thecattle-marking, when, heaven knows, I never cared the blue end of afinger-nail for that girl. But things have now come to a pretty passwhen even a chicken with a broken toe cannot be indisposed in my housewithout neighbour Gumesinda thrusting her beak into the matter!'
"Such anger did I feel at Pascuala when I remembered these things andother things besides, for there is no end to that woman's tongue, that Icould have thrown the dish of meat at her head.
"Just then, while occupied with these thoughts, I fell asleep. Nextmorning I got up, and without beating my head any more I bought thehorses and paid Manuel his price. For there is in me this excellentgift, when I am puzzled in mind and in doubt about anything, night makeseverything plain to me, and I rise refreshed and with my determinationformed."
Here ended Anselmo's story, without one word about those marvellousmatters he had set out to tell. They had all been clean forgotten. Hebegan to make a cigarette, and, fearing that he was about to launchforth on some fresh subject, I hastily bade good night and retreated tomy bed.